I am gathering flowers for my girl.
She waits beneath the cherry tree,
couched among the leaves upon the grass.
Her beauty is no small thing,
and through the shady boughs
Summer's breath turns the twist of her braid.
The sun is sweeping clear the morning,
turning over slowly into midday
before expiring into unseeing darkness.
These garnered blooms still hardy though,
despite the shortened moments of their existence,
they will colour the chestnut hair I love.
In truth, I cannot stem this smile,
this attitude of quiet pleasure;
she has distilled it like music.
I am gathering flowers for my girl.
She waits beneath the cherry tree,
couched among the leaves upon the grass.
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Author's Comments
My take on the romance theme.
I believe *Natural20 once offered to draw this scene for me. Edit: *Natural20 has indeed created a wonderful drawing to accompany this piece, she has captured the wonderful wispiness of the theme, and the dreamlike quality I was aiming for. Thank you so much, *Natural20. Note: This is a resubmitted piece, so if you've commented on it previously you needn't feel forced to comment again. Daily DeviationGiven 2005-12-14Summer's Girl by *jahg is one of the most quietly romantic poems I've read, and seems to contain a contented unity all of its own. Hopefully you'll agree. (Suggested by ~Aladdin-Sane and Featured by `imperfect) Comments
 I like this one alot. I liked it last time you posted it, but I think I like it more this second time around. Again, nice to see this theme from you.
-- [=-NYX @ Night -=] It's good to hear my work improves on re-reading - that's a wonderful compliment, thank you.
 this HAS gotten much better at this reading..not that it needed much improvement to begin with..
The use of repetition adds lustre and closure to this happy tale..and the mesmerizing language you used was highly in favour of her..It was soft sweet and supple..It makes the reader adore her, as she can be seen as a metaphor too..brilliant imagery and diction..this was very very very well excecuted and flowed well.  Beautiful image
 One day I am going to try to write the definitive love poem - part of it came to me in my sleep and I wrote it out this morning.
The repetition of the first stanza at the close of this piece was intended to indicate a sense of love never achieved but always attempted. Also, though the images are themselves beautiful, the piece doesn't actually place the two lovers together in the same scene - they never touch or kiss, or dance together in the failing sunlight.
I wanted a slightly mournful piece, here. Do you think I've achieved that? Now that would be something!
Let me know when you do, I look foreward to reading it. there was a strong sense of need and reminiescene in there so i think u have indeed
 Excellent, I'm so pleased.
 What a beautiful scene your words draw! I especially like the lines "In truth, I cannot stem this smile,/ this attitude of quiet pleasure;". What an amazing feeling.
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July 11, 2004
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